1. It is a part of the control paradigm to want to feel superior to a rival or to one's peers, but an objective appraisal could lead to graceful acceptance of the areas of competence and excellence in a rival, without feeling inferior for that reason, because after all one has one's own areas of potential and excellence as well.
2. People with a healthy sense of the self do not allow themselves to be controlled by comparisons, set their own standards of excellence, do not seek to get their children to conform to popularly accepted notions of scholastic performance, just so that other people might approve, and allow their children's personality to flower by valuing their individuality, their style and their pace.
3. Parents often handicap their chldren by speaking disparagingly or apologetically about their indifferent or poor academic performance, but the damage caused to the self-esteem of such youngsters could affect their prospects of picking up on their studies at their own paceor growing into areas of performance for which the school provides no avenues.
4. Parents who have a high level of self-awareness and a positive self-image will not easily submit their children to the torture of being judged by the currently popular standards of competitiveness.
5. Parents who are strongly conditioned by social conformity might like to examine whether it is a lack of a strong sense of affirmation that is leading them to subject themselves and their children to the norms of social competitiveness, becuase after all, if they are at peace with themselves, they will not be entirely guided by every do and don't of the social circle, and will be guided instead by their own sense of responsibility and initiative.